Sally,
Whan things get nuts for me I have learned to do what I can. And it sounds like that is exactly what you did. Now that that is done what would be the next right thing for you to do? One step at a time.
Also I was thinking about why you left in the first place. Are all those things still true? Has anything changed? It is perfectly acceptable to revisit our options but acting in haste out of desperation or anger would more than likely not be in your best interest. Take care of you. Try to remember why you made the decision to leave. It is a huge change for one and also you are grieving your dream. Allow yourself the space and time to do that.
Have you checked into meetings?
Hugs,
JT