I can totally relate to everything you said about not wanting to quit. I'm 16 days sober and I'm still not sure I want to quit forever. The key for me is to quit TODAY. Everyday you wake up quit that day. Thinking about tomorrow, next week, next month, forever, is too much for us. Just get through today and in no time you'll have a year under your belt and feel like a Million bucks.
You want this or you wouldn't be here.
Stay away from situations and people who tempt you, at least until you're strong enough in your recovery. I'm literally isolating myself right now because that's the only way I don't drink. It's only temporary.