Originally Posted by
Mango212 
Concept 4: Participation is the key to harmony.
Last month this concept came to the forefront for me.
As I embrace it in new ways, I'm no longer feeling isolated.
We can find peace and happiness, whether the alcoholic is drinking or not.
I posted this last spring.
Interpretation, in this, in the 12 steps, in life, is up to the individual. We are each individual and are allowed the freedom to see things differently. As we do so, we often also begin seeing the many ways we're alike.
I am embracing participation in many new ways. I often go to Al-anon meetings when I'm traveling. I communicate at work in new, direct and healthy ways. I reach out and become a part of healthy group activities in local communities.
None of this involves participating in toxic relationships, chaos or that which is unhealthy for me.
One of the most healing things I find about Al-anon is the phrase "One Day at a Time". I get to choose for this day. Tomorrow I can make whatever choices work for me within the perimeters of that new day. I get the freedom to change my mind, to try things out, to do new actions, to be imperfectly human.
As I change, grow and get more in touch with my Higher Power, my inner voice and my authentic self, my viewpoint of everything around me continually changes.
AA/Al-anon/12 step programs are based on suggestions from what has worked again and again for many people. I take these suggestions, one at a time, broken done into small pieces, and try them out for myself. I take what works and leave the rest. I become open to trying new actions and thought processes, one day at a time.
"A single act of kindness may seem like such a small thing, but so is an ember that starts a wildfire."
As I learn to be kind in news ways, I change. What I seek out, tolerate, choose to fill my life with changes.
I am learning to be kind to myself and my toxic FOO by not responding to texts, phone calls or emails. I'm now seeing kindness in actions I've been led to by my Higher Power. In having strength to walk away. Not engaging in sick/ill behaviours can be a type of kindness.