Hello wynwrights i really liked your thread ...i hope you soon feel better. Well done on 7 months now it seems you are going through grief of some not so good choices, but please do not beat yourself too hard . Some lost opportunieties , some terrible self destructive and their natural consequences would make anybody sad. It is to pat yourself you stopped and entered healing. This is the most important. After sadness you reach acceptance in grief process of course if i sense right. as maybe it is something different. Sending big hugs and prayers xD