Hullo, hullo! I’m sorry for your situation, but here’s the rub: just like you, I used to turn every little (or big) bump in the road into an excuse to drink at the expense of my family’s wellbeing and also my own. That’s the way of the problem drinker, I feel, and it was certainly MY way: drink caused drama because my whole self was soaked in drink, and then said drama and its associated discomfort in turn justified more and more drinking as a crutch, a reward, an escape, a comfort... call it what you will. On and on it went, while I got sicker and sicker, mentally, physically and emotionally.
But! There’s a brilliant way out of all this drama and illness and misery and that is not drinking. Be really honest with yourself and I’m sure you will see, just as so many have seen before you, that all the upset and the misery eventually become fantastically convenient reasons to keep on drinking. In the end I recognized that I was ultimately in charge of the alcohol, and that the alcohol wasn’t in charge of me, and that gave me the push I needed to stop drinking — so far with some success. If I can do it, so can you. Stop selling yourself short and stop drinking: you’re worth much more than the situation you currently find yourself in.