If you don't want to go, don't go. No sense trying to force a square peg in a round hole. If you think IRL meetings will help, commit to driving elsewhere, go 100kms if you have to. There are on-line AA meetings, they are OK, I did quite a few, the problem is the shares, it's like they are writing in stanzas and have this great knowledge to impart and sometimes it falls really flat. I drove 50kms to meetings to not have to see people I know. I decided meetings weren't where it was at for me. Someone recently posted about SMART teleconferences. That could be an option.
I remember last Christmas at the Santa Claus Parade, saying something to someone I was standing with about an acquaintance riding in a float for someone else's farm, saying I didn't know they were acquainted. The person I was speaking with replied that was his AA sponsor. So I found out they were both in AA. I was not two months into my own recovery at that point. So, I totally get what you are saying and agree with you.
I am an alcoholic, I can never drink again. I am taking steps to recover, but it is my business and I don't tell my own business to people. My best friend is still surprised I don't drink anymore, she doesn't know why, she just accepts I gave it up - I don't hammer her about doing keto - she gave up carbs, I gave up wine, that's life. I have a husband, children, businesses and seats at different organisations tables, including one I founded, hopefully a council seat this fall. I was lucky enough to have stopped in time. Loose lips sink ships and my ship is on it's right course finally.
My suggestion, commit to sobriety, commit to a plan to remain sober and take what you can from as many different places as possible and make maintaining sobriety your number one commitment until it becomes as easy as breathing. Do not set yourself up to fail and if AA meetings are a surefire failure for you, don't go, there are literally thousands of ways to recover, AA is just one.