Originally Posted by hellrzr

"Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty. Their chances are less than average.

There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest."

AA Big Book, Chapter 5, How It Works.

Sounds like the professionals are telling you the EXACT same thing you have been told on this site over and over and over and over again. When you truly get miserable enough that you can't take it anymore I hope you will finally give AA a chance.