Zukunft

Hi my wise and supportive friends. I am now in the process of separation with my SO while the rehab support is still available. My therapist is confirming and supporting my decision to separate. My SO’s therapist is discussing all the options for alternative living arrangements (half way housing, group living etc).

The sticking point is my SO is not realizing the pain and suffering I have experienced over the years, the need for me to be alone and the deep conviction that I will be a better person without him. I’m still being called out as not being honest or full of youknowwhat. More belittling. I know this balling and disbelief comes from denial, self frustration, sadness and anger of the whole situation (not directed at me) but it is blocking the progress. We are remarkably able to discuss all this together since we both are stronger than before and both still want what’s best for each other. I think. Perhaps I’m convinced that we both want that? I’ve been compassionate and especially as of our last conversation, very direct about expressing my needs and wants. I want out. I’ve said it.

So. Am I missing anything? Is there anything you wise people have said to recovering loved ones that has helped to unblock to flow of emotions and thoughts so that separation can move ahead as best as possible? I’ll lurch, grind, drag and run if I have to but if anyone has any suggestions, I’m all grateful ears. Oh and some hugs will keep me going too! Thanks to everyone reading this. Knowing you’re there and I can write freely at this tough juncture is an enormous help. X