Originally Posted by
Obladi 
I used to look for the "why" a lot. And I found it in many places, but never something I could say "Oh, THAT'S it." Too many Its. So now I'm from the "I was born an alcoholic" camp. Not that this meant I was destined, but I was highly susceptible to addiction. It's in my makeup, in my history, in my genetics. Thinking about it this way now takes away the angst. It's just part of my story and that is how it is.
Gabe, I think minimizing expectations at this point is a healthy thing to do. If all you do today is not drink (and treat your guests cordially), then the day is a success. No need to be scared - you've already proven yourself to be incredibly strong living the addictive life. You have that strength whilst sober as well - moreso.
O
Hey O. Yeah, what you say makes a lot of sense. I've gone round and round with the 'whys' and found it just paves the way for the barganing that leads me right back to trying 'moderation' again. It's hard to accept that it is what it is but I have to. I can't drink and there needs to be a full stop after that statement.
I'm doing ok with the entertaining guests....I just cook means then excuse myself for a nap!! Service then rest. It's a winner 💗
Edit: I DON'T drink, full stop.