Thread: Gabe's Thread
View Single Post
Old 07-15-2018, 05:05 AM
  # 36 (permalink)  
Gabe1980
Member
 
Gabe1980's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,837
Hey everyone! I'm alright today. Having a bit of a difficulty controlling my mood, alway fun when you have visitors.....I feel like there is a spoiled and resentful little brat inside of me that in chiming in every now and again. My AV most likely, and it makes me irritable and a bit sullen.
I'm trying to combat it by being helpful and making sure my parents have a good time here. It's an odd feeling.....to go between two states of mind like this......like my mind is trying to sort itself out.

Anyway, I'm getting there, and that's the main thing. I do feel like all the fantasies or illusions about recovery I have harboured over the last year are falling away and this feels real. Difficult and more scary than before but real. Like I've hit the ground with a thump. I don't have that 'I'm sober now, lets move on feeling'. I think this is a really good thing. I think that I have my expectations in the right place.

Happy Sunday everyone. Love Gabe xxx
Gabe1980 is offline