Sooo......Feeling a wee bit better today!
I'm so glad I starting writing to myself when I felt terrible because it is already starting to fade in my memory. Not in a general way....I know it was bloody horrendous....but it all the small and really specific ways that make it more frightening. I'm going to keep writing, I think it will really help me keep clarity and focus.
The main thoughts for today are...
So many things don't matter-
What friends and family think, what social stuff is happening this year, holidays and weddings etc.
What I feel like, when I feel it.
Whether this is 'fair' or not, whether this is 'normal', what is 'normal', what it Scottish!!!
All these things just don't matter. What matter's is that I don't drink, will never drink again and I wont change my mind.
All that matters is alcohol might kill me every time I drink.
Hope you all have a lovely day folks xxx