I didn't know how to get out either - I was 40 and drinking all day every day from wake up to pass out and had been doing that for about 5 years.
Lots of binge drinking before that.
I took things a day a time to start with - that was eleven years ago
I'm sorry about your mom. I lost a good friend to cancer.
I'm glad I was able to be sober and there for him - I really consider that whole experience a gift.
I'm sorry about your sister too. You'll find people here, survivors, of stuff like that too.
Hope to see you around some more, Kid
D