once i was abstinent, i really didn't need a reason per se to stay that way.
the reaon is what got me there, and almost irrelevant. the 'how' wasn't based on motivation at that point, and going forward.
and fighting the AV has not been part of anything that has ever worked for me; when i was fighting, i eventually always lost.
if you are engaging with the AV in a fighting manner, maybe check out AVRT and Rational Recovery, which will show you a way to stop doing that.