3 Weeks today
3 Sundays ago, I drank myself to oblivion per usual, although also moreso than usual because I’d made a colossal mistake at work and was facing the repercussions the next day, and I also wanted to open a third bottle of wine. Instead, I listened to some wise words on this forum and “drank some water and went to bed”.
3 weeks later, I can 150% say I haven’t been tempted. The wine has been there. I have a couple of bottles in my house that are rare and/or sentimental to me and no, I will not throw them out or dump them down the drain. Also trust me when I say if I haven’t even thought about touching them once in the past 5-8 years, I’m not going to start now. There’s a Publix in walking distance of me, if I really wanted to. So the special wine in my home is a non-issue. But I haven’t gone to Publix. And that’s a victory.
The ‘best friend’ I always talk about asked if I wanted to get a drink after work the other day. I sort of fibbed my way out of it, and yes I know I need to have a conversation with her, but the bottom line is I didn’t go. And that’s a victory.
I don’t even remember what it feels like to be hungover. And that is a HUUUUUGE victory!!! I feel like in some ways, I spent the past 3 years hungover, in one way or the other. Now, I’ve had great nights of sleep and I’ve had okay nights of sleep. Even the okay nights of sleep are a million times better than the hungover nights. My mind is so clear.
We have a former client who comes in once a month to pay on her bill. She came in the other day, and the first thing she said when I walked into the lobby was “You’ve lost weight!” She comes in pretty religiously to pay her bill, so I last saw her only about a month ago...right before my rock bottom. I was so flattered and proud of what she noticed, and didn’t even think about the added benefit of skipping all those empty calories!!
I have been warned of complacency, and alcoholic voices, and all kinds of things, but like I’ve said before, i don’t want to sit around waiting for negatives, or thinking negatively. I feel awesome, and feel like I need to be proud of myself for that, so I’m taking a minute to do that.