Hi Horn. I totally understand your situation. My husband frequently goes out and then just doesn’t come home. ( Not so much any more thankfully.) He gets really drunk and crashes at his friends house always forgetting to call me.
Obviously I would freak out and then when he would show up I’d be so angry and we’d fight and my emotions were all over the place. Then I’d drink and blame him.
Now if that happens I pray to God (my HP) and release my husband to Him. I thank God that I am sober and my children have a parent who is present and can be there for them. I also pray for my husband. He has a drinking problem just like I do but he hasn’t been able to stay sober so I look at him as a sick man. It took a while but I no longer worry or get angry at him When he gets home.
Not sure if any of this is helpful but just know that I’ve been there and I get it. 💕