I'm sorry for your situation. I can relate so much to what you're going through right now. I never felt so alone as when my husband confronted me about my drinking and fully expected me to fix the mess. I had to do a lot of soul-searching to find my way through the early days. I discovered that many of the things, both good and bad, that I'd believed about myself were not true. I discovered that, even though I was going through it alone, I could do it.
I think it's up to you to find a path that works for you. I'm not an AA person but I have found things that work for me in my recovery. Have faith that you can do this.
