I'm here, I'm alive. I tried to commit suicide two times but it didn't work. I won't do that again, I promise. I sm really low though. I don't know how much more I can take. I've been raped two times, I almost died giving birth to my first sons and my son almost died. I then suffered severe post part depression. My ex continuously cheated on me and emotionally abused me. I gave both to my second son and two weeks later went to the emergency room with a fever of 105, they had left the placenta in and I was dying from the infection. I then had to have an abortion for medical reasons, then my psychiatrist fired me, I then went to rehab and one week after I left my boyfriend found me ion the bed, I had **** and pissed myself, totally unconscious, I went to the emergency room and was admitted to intensive care for severe pneumonia.I am tired. I m so so tired.