My experience with my own children is that I have to be a strong leader and a positive force in their lives to maintain and keep my relationship with them solid. I am always vigilant about my program of recovery, service work, and spirituality. They see me "doing the deal" and they want me in their life. For the past 13 years this is how I've been a father, a husband, and I've added stepfather and grandfather to my roles too as a result of this. I think we need to be shining examples to our families. It takes some work, but other men were role models to me too in my recovery so I knew it was possible.