Originally Posted by
rayna87 
I am going on 2 weeks of not drinking. I haven’t been hungover in 2 weeks. I used to barely go 2 days without feeling like death. I’ve been tired, had some weird nights of sleep, but nothing like those nights I don’t even remember.
I feel like this is going way too easily well. Like I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the issues to set in. But they’re not. I don’t want wine. I don’t want to go to the bar. I actually DID go to a bar last weekend, to drink cranberry juice and see my best friend, as opposed to sitting home alone all weekend. Said best friend was drunk out of her mind, and I was repulsed by it and my former life. No triggers, no desires, no nothing. If anything, i was happy to have gone to the bar and seen her acting a fool, it reinforced my decision. I’ve read peoples’ posts...this can’t be that easy, can it? The real hard part must be coming?
Well done on 2 weeks! I never really had a 'hard part' when I finally took my alcoholism seriously and quit drinking. I was always, like you put it, waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it didn't actually. I never really had any close calls or cravings or moments when I felt I was at risk of losing my sobriety. But what I did was I kept working my plan solidly, did everything I was supposed to do, and never let my guard down.
In fact, I did not let my guard down until ... well, Iet me think, I have never let it down. Not after 1 year, not after 2 years. With the grace of some higher power, I just passed 2.5 years sober.
Originally Posted by
rayna87 I come from a long line of Irish drinkers, and my grandmother quit cold turkey one day. She had a bad night, woke up in a bad place (literally) and that was the end of that. Maybe I’ve inherited her bullheadedness? I don’t know, but I’m scared of letting my guard down, and then getting caught off guard. But then again, I feel like if the above-referenced best friend, or even my family, were to want to hang out this weekend, I feel very confidently that I could safely go out with them, have a couple of drinks SOCIALLY (as opposed to what the best friend looked like last weekend) and also go back to being this normal self the next day that i have recently found, with no problems.
There’s no way this can be that easy. What am I missing?
When I read this I thought ... what am
I missing? You refer to your grandmother's bullheadedness about quitting cold turkey, but then in the next couple of lines, talk about drinking again. What you are possibly missing is that one of the biggest reasons for relapse is complacency.
If you are worried about letting your guard down, I'd say you've just done it in this paragraph.