it sounds like you continue to give yourself permission to drink.....or conversely have not made the 100% commitment to not drink again under any circumstances, PERIOD.
you mention that you "went out" - was this an event or outing that you knew would involve alcohol? there are a lot of things we can do, choices we can make, that help to protect and defend our sobriety. but we have to place VALUE on that sobriety, treasure it, hold it near and dear and defend it all costs. booze doesn't just fall from the ceiling and into our glass........and that glass never touches our lips unless we bend our arm at the elbow, or fall forward to drink from the straw.
now would be a good time to get serious.....more serious than you have ever been. fearless. become willing to do WHATEVER IT TAKES..........