Bubblegum

Hi, I met a Man three yrs ago, and knew he was a very angry man, when i met him. I thought he had been hurt really bad by a divorce. But as i got to know him, i watched his drinking, he has a problem, hes a closet drinker, he goes to work, but doesn't do much else, because it cuts into his drinking time. i mean he does his work around house, or what ever needs to be done, and then he drinks, one right after the other.i know now, after ready about the enablers. evne though we don't live together, and i do not plan on living with him, because of his drinking. But i am the one who always travels to his house, he never comes here, and there have been times he would call and asl me to pick up beer. I don't say anything about his drinking anymore, its his life, once in a while he will bring it up and want to do something about it.. but then in the next sentence, he'll say i'l never quit totaly drinking.. so i go to visit him on saturdays. and sometimes feel like his therapist.and if he starts being a jerk,I just get up and leave. plain and simple, then he will call a few days later, and say do you hate me?? I say NO, but you hurt my feelings, so i left. he used to get rough with me, and i told him i didn't like it, and wasn't coming back unless it stopped. well it stopped, and some mean things hes said, have stopped, cause he knows i'll just go away.but if i lived with him, then it may all come back, then have no where to go. I understand, the part when you don't say anything, and let them deal with there own pain, and then they have nothing to get defensive about. But i do care about this Man, as a friend, because it seems to me that it will never get further than that because i won't let it.but on the same note... I can't move on and meet someone else, because of the chance he might want to change on his own. so my question is this.... How do i stay in his life as a friend, but yet move on, and try to meet someone else, I was married to an acoholic, for a short time, but left after a short time, realizing my kids would have a better life with one parent, who didn't drink . and my daughter thanked me for not drinking, because, she has friends that have had some pretty messed up lifes. My oldest daughter was killed at age 13 in a auto accident. my youngest is now 19, and since then, have had two realtionships, that did not invole drinking,and now that i am in the dating scene again, that all i seem to meet, and can't go futher with them for that reason. i need to feel safe and secure in a relatioship, and will just live alone, til i fins that someone, but this guy i know now... just has so much hurt, and i think he trusts me now, and i don't want to walk away from him... yet i can't live with him. its been three years... what do i do. thanks for reading