Hi StopRelapsing. To be honest, I have had many "enough is enough" moments in my drinking career. The first time I had to go to the hospital due to terrible withdrawal (and having no idea what was going on with me), I told myself enough is enough; this is the end. And it was, for a while... but as time went on and the horror of that day faded, I ended up trying to drink again. As you can imagine, I overdid it and ended up wasted for like 3 days straight.
I personally do not believe in the concept of "rock bottom". Knowing my rock bottom is made of glass and can shatter and go deeper is key to my personal recovery plan. I wouldn't wait for one moment of epiphany when everything becomes clear. You know you need to stop now, or the few freedoms you can enjoy will also be eliminated.
I would get involved in a support network in your area, whether it be AA or NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) or another group that provides support to people who are struggling with substance abuse and/or mental illness. It will make you feel connected and help you understand that despite feeling isolated, you are not alone.
I wish you the best!
