Originally Posted by
daredevil 
Regrettably, I’ve binged again since I last posted, but am back on the wagon.
I have come to realize that a part of me will always desire oblivion.
Wishing the desire for oblivion away, or medicating the feelings that accompany that desire, is something I’ve decided against.
Congratulations, I believe you are making some positive movement towards taking a realistic position that will ultimately result in the destruction of your rhythmic cycling into and out of oblivion.
A rythym with desires and pangs just like eating/starving, breathing/suffocating, or copulating/celibacy.
Of course, the difference being, if you starve/suffocate THIS one you will return to human being.