Hi everyone, Day 36 Finished, as i mentioned earlier i past my milestone so now where in new waters. Good healthy sober waters.
thanks for reading the update.
Generally, things are pretty good besides the odd crappy day where i get stuck in my head.
Now being this amount in I've come to the realisation of a few personality traits that i would like to work on.
Firstly i think iam grateful, but sadly iam not. I have encountered a lot of people recently who have lost loved ones, fallen very sick, had accidents, divorces, or divorces and financial implosions or are full time cares for very sick and disabled and terminal family members. These people, like me, juggle the same lifestyle. Work, stress, building a life and so forth.
as said again, i THINK am grateful, but i obviously don't know the difference yet considering my none of these things have happened.
but the way my personality is developing, i think divorce would be something i should prepare for, sadly this is how I am programmed to think for someone who is not even married yet - it might be the constant bombardment of the world divorce rate going up most close people to me getting divorced, its like its expected now.
the second thing is Anger.
36 days in ive noticed that my anger is still very explosive, so I am guessing this is more of the developed personality trait. I have been trying very hard to contain it and work on it, but that's part of the problem, i contain it and it eventually explodes and i tell the person I've been fake smiling too everything that was on my mind.
I don't work in a team or with people for this reason alone, iam a straight shooter and always speak my mind, this can be problematic in a team environment that's why I am lucky i have managed to find income in solitary work.
anyway, back to the anger thing - its there and its causing me many problems in my family, in my self-esteem and in my relationships with woman.
I have a lot of work to do on myself. Iam 27 and iam hoping its not too late to try to change or at least improve some negative personality traits that i have.
I am also waking up some nights covered in sweat and everything is soaked. I don't know if this is from lack of alcohol, or its from my heavy weightlifting routine but its obviously a hormone thing so will read up on this later.
anyway thanks to whoever takes the time to read, and i wish you the best on your own sober roads.
Stay Sober
Be Grateful
Dont be Angry