Old 06-02-2018, 01:01 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
Atlantis
Member
 
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 29
For sure. I have to have a plan before exiting. There's no such thing as a perfect exit in my case; but I have to prepare either way; in the event I have to leave, at least I know where I am and where I'm headed financially, emotionally and mentally before just throwing myself out of the marriage (esp. since he's sober now and most importantly; have a "lawful contact" restraining order and full custody of kids for 2 years; this gives me a bit of time to observe and make rational decisions). I'm focusing on rebuilding my own credit history, getting more experience at work/ and applying for higher paying positions, putting more money into my own saving account (he doesn't care about what I do with my income), paying the minivan's off, applying for a loan modification so that I can keep the house but the monthly amount decreases significantly, the term is extended for a couple of more years etc... and especially to prepare myself and the kids emotionally.





Originally Posted by marie1960 View Post
I must agree with Hopeworks, fear does paralyze us. So maybe you simply are not ready to made any life changing decisions today. Maybe you can use this time to formulate a plan B. Rome wasn’t built in a day,. To be solid in our decisions lessens the emotional exhaustion. Maybe now is a good time to update your resume, And be confident, go ahead and apply for new jobs, you never know where it will lead. In reading your post, I gather if money was not such an issue, you would be long gone already, and whether you realize it, are the sane responsible parent, you are pretty much on your own already, there will never be security in a home where addiction rules. Keep posting it helps.
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