I can relate to your story. I'm sorry for what brings you here to SR, but you've found a wonderful place for support.
My no-good cheater STBXAH left 3 years ago - I had to start a new life at age 39. It's been so hard, but so worth it. Now, 3 years out, I am realizing that I don't miss him at all (it's more the romanticized idea of a marriage and family that I miss, but we never really had that anyway), and I shudder to think about what my life would look like now if we had stayed together. Good riddance - he's the OW's problem now.