Thanks for the replies. I know of the Samaritans but don't know exactly what they do. It is good to have people here who do care, it means alot to me. I'm facing my biggest fears and I can't express how terrified I am. I just keep thinking it would mean the world to me to have a friend or family member who cared. I can't do it alone. I just can't. I couldn't eat yesterday either. Now I'm thinking maybe make a bag of popcorn just to try to eat something.
I just can't believe that every person I ever knew don't care if I'm dead or alive. I did so much for so many people. I was always there for anyone who needed help. I helped all my family and friends countless times. I helped people I didn't know because that's what I do and that's what I know. I am now reduced to tears and crying. One thing for sure I will die alone.