Old 05-06-2018, 05:59 PM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Wamama48
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My RAH and I reunited after he told me he'd cut down. He did for 6 months, then back to normal drinking. Fast forward 3 years and I was so stressed out, diagnosed with ptsd from his drinking and me doing nothing to help myself, and I was horribly miserable. I told him quit, or leave. He got the flu and couldn't drink. He said after 3 days his mind cleared enough to see what he was doing, and he quit. Its been 4 months, he is doing great with his sobriety. BUT, he quit drinking and is working AA. What you said here.....
I just don't see the point of therapy if his position is "I'm going to drink" and my position is "I can't live with the alcohol"....says a lot. Many therapist won't even see a couple when one partner is actively drinking. QUOTE=akrasia;6886882]Hiya,

My husband's alcoholism manifests as binges and then long sober periods. The binges always follow a period of "moderated drinking". Like he'll go a few months sober, then say, "huh, maybe I can drink normally after all," then a few weeks later we've got a binge again.

I say husband but I have actually moved out. I have told him that I couldn't take the alcohol and the Russian roulette of living under the threat of the next binge.

There were a lot of good things to the marriage. There is a lot to lose.

He wants to do couples therapy but also says he is going to drink the way he drinks and he is not going to change. He says that we should just accommodate each other's failings (like he accommodates my moodiness). Also says his drinking is not so bad.

I just don't see the point of therapy if his position is "I'm going to drink" and my position is "I can't live with the alcohol".

I think I'm just looking for a reality check.

And... has anyone successfully reunited with an alcoholic spouse? How?[/QUOTE]
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