Old 09-19-2011, 12:39 PM
  # 277 (permalink)  
Runhappy
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Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 83
I went to inpatient rehab and stayed 9 months. Then sober living another 2 years. Worked an amazing program and was a cheerleader for step recovery. I was clean for 8 or 9 years off street drugs then got injured and was prescribed Vicodin. I couldn't work my program on is drug. According to what I had learned I was in a 2 year long relapse over which I was powerless.

But my Brian was yelling bulls**t, you can stop you have before you just don't want to.
I knew my brain was right and my program just felt all wrong. I went to a bookstore and cruised the shelves for an alternative opinion. I found two books. One is "The Cure" and the other is "Breaking Addiction a 7 step handbook for ending any addiction"

The books have different opinions as to the WHY of it. 7 step claims it's a feeling of hopelessness that leads to picking up while The Cure claims it is that we just want to get high. Pure and simple.

I believe the cure gets it right as far as i am concerned. Just wanted to get high. Although of course sometimes I felt helpless but bottom line I wanted the high. Both are very similar in terms of recognizing your feelings and voice before use.

I call my Beast "slick" and so far have been able to remain clean for 8 days. Most of detox is done but still a little tired and of course alot of beast activity! But in the past 2 days I just tell Slick NO NO NO when the thought of using comes and it works for me.

Good luck to all on AVRT. I really believe this is the end of my addiction.
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