Originally Posted by
Peta 
Well the beast and AV have been quite active today
This is normal, and nothing to worry about. The Beast is a survival drive, and it wants to survive. You've backed it into a corner by cutting off its supply, and like a cornered animal, it is scared, and it is snarling. The Beast is a quadriplegic, though. It can't actually
do anything on its own (like getting a drink).
Originally Posted by
Peta ... started questioning myself and my decision a bit (that I'm a non drinker and will never change my mind) the AV was asking "do you REALLY mean that?" and I just repeated and repeated it
All self-doubt about your ability to abstain is the AV itself, injecting doubt. Remember, the AV can say "I'm going to get you tomorrow, or the day after, or next week, etc," but no matter on what day the Beast plans to drink, when that day finally comes, it will still be now. This is how you can actually be certain that you will never drink, if that is what you want.
Remember, the Big Plan can be phrased at least two different ways:
- I will never drink again, and I will never change my mind.
- I will never drink in the present moment.
I happen to prefer the first version myself, but others seem to grasp things better with the second version. If you never drink in the present moment, then the Beast can plan ahead for its next fix all it wants. That "tomorrow" will never actually come, because you'll always be in the present, and you don't drink in the present.
Originally Posted by
Peta Perhaps it has something to do with the fact my book arrived yesterday and I've begun reading in earnest!
No doubt. Keep reading!
