Hi Terminally Unique, I like and seem to relate to this AVRT “way” a lot better than the AA “way” also.
I used to smoke a pack a day for 16 years but decided to stop when my first child was born. Cold turkey just told myself.. this is no good, I want to be around for my child, I don’t want her smelling my breath or clothes, so I stopped. It was of course hard at first but I had my motivation to quit right there in the crib.
I haven’t smoked or thought about a smoke now for 13 years. I will definitely never smoke again.
Then came the alcohol, I suppose the AV has to replace one vice with another and WE/IT/I discovered alcohol. Social drinking at first ..then like the rest of us on this forum… daily.
I’ve been to three AA meetings now and they have been a comfort and an eye opener but I still don’t feel right. Even though I was a daily drinker, I never drank during the day, if I had a lunch with workmates and we all had a beer I’d have one like everyone else and walk away. I have never woken up wishing to drink. Only at nights soon as I got home. But I could feel and sense something was wrong, just like with the cigarettes.I was getting dizzy spells during the day..lips always dry, always tired, always cranky (at home), but worse of all I could feel this fog coming down over me.
So just over a week ago now I decided to stop. Not because of a doctor, a work mate, a friend, not even my wife (though she couldn’t be happier right now) but because I decided enough is enough.I was never in danger of having seizures, or panic attacks or those other horrible symptoms some poor people went through during detox. But if I hadn’t stopped I was definitely going to join them no doubt.
I saw the AV, the beast.. I don’t know how .. but I saw it. And I could feel what it was doing to me and I knew like the cigarettes it wasn’t right.
*After reading all these posts I’ve ordered the bookRational Recovery..and at my last AA meeting (and they are wonderful, caring people) all I saw was where I was heading or would've headed not where I am now. But I truly believe that some people need that group interaction, that "phone call" in crisis until they find there feet again.
Anyway, I am 47 years old, I have free will and I'm grateful I still have a choice.
So the beast can definitely go F@#% OFF.*