Sohard

I guess I do sorta care and want it to go away. It bothers me. Before I quit drinking, I would have said there were many areas of my life which could be improved, all areas of concern caused by drinking. Now that I actually have quit drinking, the only area of my life I wish was different is that I wish I could drink. What?! That doesn’t make sense! I quit drinking, life improved, and I still want to be able to drink. But it’s true - I want to be able to drink every once in a while. Of course, if I could do that, I wouldn’t be an alcoholic, and if I wasn’t an alcoholic, I wouldn’t really care if I couldn’t drink every once in a while because I wouldn’t need to satiate the craving and scratch the itch that an alcoholic does through drinking.

Basically, I want to stop missing drinking, plain and simple. I know it’s my beast, I won’t give it power, but I want it to shut up.