For me the missing diminished when I examined what it was I was missing.
My AV attributes the loss of escape /relief to not intoxicating. My AV always suggested / promised that getting intoxicated provided escape and relief and I would agree and get drunk/high .
I’m not sure if I would say I ever really achieved the promised relief and or escape, certainly not in a healthy or life affirming sense.
I may miss the promise , who wouldn’t if it were true, yeah? Realizing the promise was/is a lie makes the missing really really small practically non existent , but brains can be weird so once in awhile the promise seems plausible for like a half a nanosecond
