Yup I'm a turkey for letting my going against my better judgement and allowing my beast to win the inner debate the other day. It was silly of me. It was not an appropriate time to drink. I shouldn't be drinking alone, or to numb my feelings.
I'm still not sure about whether or not I'm ready to make the commitment of a BP. I want to explore if I am capable of being sober the majority of the time but still drink on certain occasions that are planned in advance. What I've learned over these last months is that I enjoy being sober. I used to drink every day so the only time that I felt good was when I started drinking again. And I know that I'm better off to have none than to try to have just a few.
It's a journey....... like Elvis said, "It's your baby, you rock it."