Ahhh
I have a few walls in my house that appear to have been plastered by a plastered plasterer!
Unfortunately that is the nature of the beast it's a creative disease that is desceptive by nature.
Whilst you are feeding the habit your mind is convincing you that you are able.
Able to function is all a functioning alcoholic is Able to excel is what that person is not and we would not even recognise our decline untill we reach the point of being unable to function the slap in the face the undignified awakening the shame the waste!