Originally Posted by
IdesofKKMarch 
I can't believe how progressive alcoholism is. It scared the hell out of me this last time..
Yup, that's the true nature of this particular beast: it progresses even when we're not drinking. I went back after eight years sober, and it was worse than when I'd quit.
I literally got scared straight, admitted true and utter defeat a year ago; I've had enough experiences to know where the next drink will undoubtedly lead, and since I'm not suicidal...
It sounds like you've reached your limit, too! This is a wonderful site full of caring and support, and tons of information. I'm happy you found us -- I wish you well, and hope to read more from you!
Arp