Originally Posted by
CentralOhioDad 
I've been AWOL for the last week or so - swamped at work, and in pain all the rest of the time - but enough about me. I saw this post and felt the need to comment:
Are you married to Mrs. COD as well? My AW is a good mom...... until she starts drinking, then she just gets stupid and has no idea what's going on. The house could probably burn down around her and she wouldn't know - because she's passed out on the kitchen island. Definition of island: an immovable object in the center of the kitchen used for preparing food, also has stools near it for sitting and eating, etc. Sorry - had to define that based on my previous posts. I've told Alkie that being a parent is a gift and a blessing - it's also a 24/7/365 endeavour, not to be taken lightly. My Alkie is a 13/7/365 parent - well short of what I consider the minimum. I feel for you.
Also, AW also has the martyr streak in her as well - all she does is cook and clean and this and that, and that and this. It gets really OLD. What's interesting is that in the past 8 years, she has had several medical conditions (other than booze) that have made her unable to do much of anything around the house - totally about a year's time. Amazingly, the kid was fed, the dishes NEVER piled up, the vacuuming and the dusting and laundry were all done - to the point of being 'visitor-ready' at all times. Yet, she's "always done everything around the house". Yeah, we get you. It's all quacking.
I hear/feel ya COD.
My AW usually doesn't usually pass out (just sometimes) - but, that's often worse. She's unsteady on her feet, swaying, argumentative - even argues with the television (it's Bill Maher. On television. You know he can't hear you, right?).
And the repetition -- egads the repetition. We can have a "discussion" like - ok, you're dropping the car off tomorrow at the mechanic's right? Yes. Five minutes later: how are we getting the car to mechanics? I'm dropping it off. Ok. Five minutes later: what are we doing about the car tomorrow??
My step-mother developed dementia and Alzheimer's . . . and it's like that with AW when she's drinking.
I would say mornings are actually best with my AW -- she may be sick, nausea, etc. but she's not tipsy drunk yet. No arguing, Coherent thoughts, no repetition etc.
My AW is also OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). I could care less whether the house is "visitor ready" or not. Look, if you know us well enough to just "drop in," then you know we both work jobs, we have two kids (one under the age of 5 y.o.) toys will be out in the living room, etc. So if finding dishes in the sink bothers you, Mr./Ms. Visitor - my view is call and make an appointment.
My "thermostat" for dishes, toys, etc. is set higher than hers. Oh, to be sure, I'll reach a point where "ok, dammit" kids get in here and pick up the toys, I gotta get those dishes done, etc. -- but even ONE cup/dish is too much for her.
BUT, OTOH, the kids will have clean clothes, get their baths at night, get dinner, etc. And that's a lot of what AW's doing due to our schedule. I get the mornings - so get 'em up, get 'em fed, lunches packed (or lunch money), etc.
MCESaint.