I think bitter is a natural
reaction to a disease as rugged as alcoholism. I would venture a guess that all of us here have had our bitter moments. As for misguided, you sound like your heart is in the right place, so I wouldn't call that misguided.
It's hard to love someone who seems hell bent for destruction. It's hard not to get angry and throw their beer away. Most of all, it's hard not to be able to fix what is wrong with them. Because when you love someone, you just want to make things all better.
I think you will find a lot of support and guidance in Alanon. And you will find those same things here on this board.
I have two alcoholics in my life. My mother and my ex-husband. I still have issues with both of them from time to time that require prayer, meditation and sometimes just some good old hot-headed ranting.
Hang around, there are good people here who often become my smile for the day.
Peace,
Gabe