There wasn't one single reply to your OP that said alcoholics are the 'scum of the earth" or that you should treat him like 'worthless garbage'. Not one person said that. I suggest you go back and reread the replies. What they did tell you was very sound advice. You can care, but you can't save him, and nothing YOU do will affect his recovery. That's on him. By being involved in his life at this point, you are actually making it harder for him to take responsibility for his decisions. Yes, alcoholism may be a disease, but for many many of us the only thing that led us to change was experiencing the full consequences (pain) of our own decisions and actions. It's a difficult and painful thing to endure. best wishes to you.