Hi Mictar (Michael). Welcome to SR. I am so sorry you feel this way but everyone on this site understands. I am glad you found us here. I have had the same problems with anxiety/weed/drink/anxiety cycle for many years. Its horrible. Please get off the treadmill. Try and get to an AA meeting. Or just stay around this website as much as you can. Ditch the booze please.
Read other posts and post yourself. It does help I know. I am 2 months sober today and working on the ODAAT one day at a time system. I check in every morning on the 24 hour recovery thread. It helps. At the beginning - the first few sober days take it an hour at a time.
Take care Michael. Thank you for your posts. Stay around us. Ditch what booze you have.