Originally Posted by
Ragsdash 
I made my big plan but I don't rememberACE.
After finally understanding that my decisionmaking after drinking alcohol was always contrary to my plans before that first drink, I knew I had to pledge to never drink again, or wallow in the vagaries of "to drink or not to drink" one day at a time for the rest of my thus-shortened life.
Making that Big Plan for me was more than the sum of its parts - I will never drink again (five words). It was a shattering transformative event in my brain. It resulted in my instantly becoming an arch traitor to a long held, deeply loved cause - trying to secure a place for safely getting drunk into my life.
I believe making the (only once in a lifetime) Big Plan, without exception, will allow an addicted person to experience this "becoming an arch traitor" effect, and recognize in a brand new light, the fog of deception under which he/she had been living. To me, this is the core of the ACE. I couldn't help but SEE what I had been doing, what I had JUST decided I would never do again, and what that would MEAN for the rest of my future. It was awesomely exciting - GOOD, not bad. AVRT articulates simple thinking tactics for extending this as time passes.
Our society revels in glorifying all the joyous aspects of indulging in the pleasure of alcohol, but those of us who loved it too much and finally made the Big Plan, know better for ourselves.
As time has passed, following making a Big Plan, my sensitivities to pleasure have refined back to normal. I no longer rely on chemically induced assaults of pleasure (not even caffeine or sugar for me, I made separate Big Plans on those). This has allowed me to swim within my own unadulterated feelings and thoughts and I have discovered an incredible degree of variety within that realm - what I consider a "normal realm" of thoughts and feelings based upon my naturally produced internal chemistry.
It sounds like your getting there, too. You are also learning to swim within your own natural body chemistry. Have fun. It's really what human life is all about.
Simply put, your AV wants you to "stew in your own juices" so IT can get you to add ITs juice to your mix.
Getting drunk is a briefer, violent, animal life in the jungle.