My ex ah is a bully
My ex ah is a bully. Always has been. I did not really pick up on this behavior until our last couple of years together. When we were together if I tried to stand up to him I of course would have to pay the consequences. As soon as we separated, I started to stand up for myself or not give in to when he asked for something. One thing I have learned is that he might try a few attempts to get me to do what we wants but each time he has backed down. Pretty much all talk.
I let the fear of what he said he was going to do stop me from making healthy decisions. Turns out what he says he is going to do is all just empty threats. Feels good to be able to stand up for myself with out the repercussions about what would happen if I did not follow his orders. I will say that when we married he would break stuff (mainly of mine or threaten to which is not an issue now since we are not married and if he did that now he knows I will press charges)
From your experience is the bullying a typical behavior of an alcoholic? In my case, I think it is his personality but the alcohol magnifies it. This behavior is not directed to just me, I have noticed it in his relationships with family and friends. Everything just has to be his way and if you don't go along you will pay the price.