Originally Posted by daredevil

I often hear derivations of 'it gets better with time' in recovery (at AA -- sometimes at SMART too [I go to several SMART meetings weekly]), but I wonder how true this is. I have been completely sober for almost 2 months; I went to an inpatient facility for a month in the summer, but (very) shortly after I left, I started drinking again (in a much more controlled fashion, albeit I wouldn't necessarily say drinking a pint of vodka nightly is 'controlled' -- but it was....relatively). In September and October (2017) I started stringing 3 -5 days sobriety, in November 7-10 days and last drank in mid-December. Been -- and continue to be-- sober-- today and henceforth.

Things weren't too bad, even though I went through 3 handles of vodkas per week. My lab work has stabilized, am gainfully employed, live and work in a big, northeastern city, and have a pretty good life. That said, I was drinking as much as I was drinking (towards the end, it became daily, round-the-clock) because it made certain intolerable areas/aspects of life tolerable. I recognize these areas of my life and recalibrate my approach/goals constantly, striving to live an authentic life. I've also picked up an old hobby that I enjoyed doing (before I was drinking as heavily as I was) and also joined a gym (was also very much into fitness and nutrition) several weeks ago and consistently go.

I do feel better, no doubt, in mind, body, spirit and soul-- but I don't know.....obviously, things have gotten better by virtue of not having gotten worse (alcohol not only exacerbated existing problems, but became one--and would have invariably precipitated new ones), I am more malleable and goal-oriented, more relaxed (generally), and more cognizant of the things I conveniently decided to not pay attention to before. But whenever I've heard (three times thus far) 'my life is beyond my wildest dreams' or some derivation thereof (all three times at AA meetings) I recall thinking that that just sounds preposterous. But then, I could be mistaken...everyone has different aspirations and expectations for their lives; for me at least, sobriety is a necessary component of sustainable happiness, albeit not in and of itself sufficient for my recovery. I get that things don't 'just get better,' that it takes affirmative steps and sustainable changes, and I accept that there's no timeline (or that it varies for each person), but there doesn't seem to be any 'miracle' around the corner. I guess I am feeling reflective and thinking out loud, wondering if other people have had similar thoughts on this matter. In any event, thanks for reading; I am glad I found this place.