Yeah I can't let a few words from people who don't know what I'm going through sway my judgement. I know what the deal is and I know where I go when I pick up a bottle. I seen my therapist today and talked through it all and have seen sense. I told him about my first ever post I posted here and he suggested I maybe print it out and keep it in my purse and I can read it when Im having a hard day. The therapist is great he really helps me understand things abit clearer. Glad to find people who understand here too. Thanks lpg