I don't think I ever knew why I drank, it's just what I did daily. The reason I drank daily is because I'm an alcoholic. It was never about anyone, people, places or things out there, it's because I have the disease of alcoholism.
In the 1970's I thought things would get better if I moved to Rio de Janeiro, which I did, and stayed for 1.5 years. I took myself with me and my disease progressed. I tried different jobs, husbands and all kinds of changes except my disease progressed anyway. It was only by crawling into the doors of AA and saying "help!!" that I stopped drinking and got the help I needed to stay sober.