Originally Posted by
Mercedes5555 
I am grateful for all the words of wisdom you all share. I can only imagine the pain you all are too familiar with to have gained such knowledge. I am aware that he may never stop drinking. It breaks my heart and I can only wish he realize that he should stop.
Mercedes, I'm in the exact position that you're in. I love my husband very much but he has made his choice.
They chose alcohol over everything else. To me that says, we are no longer needed or wanted. That's very painful to accept but accept it you must for your own emotional freedom. I have no interest at all in a man that doesn't want to be with me more than he wants to drink. The very idea of being with someone like that makes me want to drink.
He's told me a few alkie lies about loving me and missing me and how sorry he is for all the drama and pain he's caused me. I say bull sh!t. Not one word has he said about recovery. He said he's treating his problem with "work" . He's living with a alkie friend and his family and being a third wheel to an already alcohol damaged situation. In my opinion these men are selfish immature cowards with a huge dose of self pity and don't give a damn.
Do not feel sorry for them. It doesn't help. You have been given excellent advice by these long suffering people. Take it. There is nothing else you can do.
I did the whole codie routine. All by email mind you, sending self help crap inspirational thought's loving messages. Nothing will work but they will try manipulation on you. It's exhausting and i started to feel , STUPID. I eventually started cursing his as$ out. He responded to that for some reason.
Leave him to finish his downward spiral. My A crashed four cars, constantly lied verbally abused me and only God knows what else. For five years together he was a very good man. That's why i tolerated the last three as he became a part time demon from hell. Be grateful he's gone. It was a gift.