Originally Posted by
AlericB 
I can relate to much of that but the part I've underlined is why I think making a BP is not a pursely rational process - it's also undertaken intuitively.
I went to the doctor. I told him it hurts when I do this. He said, "Stop doing that."
Not sure I understand what you mean. Are you implying that one with alcoholic tendencies or under the influence is incapable of making a rational decision? Unless one is 100% inebriated 100% of the time, then I'll agree. But even the "best" of us drinks have our moments of clarity along the way. If this was not so, we'd all still be drunks.
I think intuition does not come into play here because I intuitively drank every single day. It was the only way I knew how to cope with life. However, you toss a baby - an infant - in the water and it will intuitively attempt to swim. Don't over think it. The fact that you are able to debate yourself over something shows rational thinking.
It's more a matter of do you really want this or not. I'm not suggesting you don't. It just seems like you are still on the fence, still looking for 'holes'. The only 'hole' in this entire process is one's ability, or inability, to be able to recognize anything at all that goes against their will to not drink. Any thoughts at all that would lead to a drink are to be recognized and understood to be the "addictive voice" in your head - AV. The "beast" or any number of titles one wishes to give it. It is a battle in the beginning because the beast is very strong - he has been running your life for quite some time. But the longer you are able to shut him up, the quieter he gets and eventually he rarely if ever comes back. In my early days I actually found myself saying out loud, "I will never drink again and I will never change my mind," while driving down the road and the thought of a drink crossed my mind. It works, it really does. Shuts that beast right up.