Many times
when I post, I describe something I’m going through during my recovery and I’ve had others tell me the feelings I’m having are not unheard of. Somehow this helps me, to realize I’m not unique. Well, approaching 30 days I had a bout of self-loathing this morning. Could be a withdrawal symptom- biophysical- but I’m also thinking that I’ve stopped lying to myself since I’ve decided to quit, and it’s just something I’m facing emotion-wise. I’m a selfish person yep but I am not totally that way. I guess I’m just hiding from nothing now. It’s probably a good thing but it hurts like hell. Redemption? Yeah, that’s what I’m seeking, and I can see it on that ol’ horizon. Subconsciously, this may be a reason I never stopped drinking before this time. I betcha I was dreading this self-analyzation.