I used to be the one who would stress out about mess, particularly before company came over, so I sort of understand your husband's issue.
I'd start stressing out over what was messy, how it was messy, how much time it would take to make it unmessy, and how nobody else cleaned the way I liked it done, etc., etc.
My tapes would tell me I was the only one who could clean it all up. Before I knew it, I'd be telling myself no one else cares, I'm the only one who cares whether the place is clean, I can't do it all by myself, why doesn't anybody else care the way I do, what's wrong with them, they are inconsiderate, this is horrible, etc., etc.
Downward spiral into crazy town.
What would have helped me out of it (in addition to working on the interior tapes)? Perhaps if my partner saw the behavior happening and they asked me the question: are you alright?
Assuming I felt safe enough to say, no, I'm feeling stressed out and here's why, if my partner could bring rationality (and compassion) to my distress by saying things like, "It's going to be okay, we will help you clean, you don't have to do it all by yourself, let go of perfection" I believe the crazy interior dialog would loosen it's grip.
I think such an interaction might be helpful.
Of course, this is all largely theoretical. Sometimes the best thing for me is to walk away and take a breather.
In the end, you cannot change your spouse and your spouse needs to learn acceptance of things as they are. You can only offer loving support, then detach from the results. Good luck and happy new year!