Hi Rupert
I just asked about you on another thread & then spotted this!
I'm sorry for your situation, being a carer must be tough, and worse when the alcohol issues are added.
I quit drinking 3 months ago, I drank a bottle of wine a night. My husband still drinks though so I am used to alcohol being in the house , we always have some in!
I think of the alcohol issues as my issue, not anyone else's which helps me. I had just got to the point of enough was enough and I stopped, and concentrated on myself. My starting point was 90 days off but then I realised I had to stop, period. It is harder in the sense that the alcohol is available if I ever feel overwhelmed but this site is amazing, posting here really helps me. I'm committed to the fact that I won't drink, even I am sitting next to my husband who is!
You can do it! X